a question and a true story

This morning I had both children in the Dreaded Supercenter, buying a few things that just could not wait until after bedtime, when I could go alone.  I had found a spare key with a flashlight attached, and Asher was playing with it in the bag of the cart, while Silas was strapped into the front (though the straps are merely a suggestion for Silas, who is completely capable of standing up in the cart while strapped in).  Anyway, I am slowly stacking groceries around Asher, trying to put the sturdiest items closest to him and the more fragile items further back.  At one point I saw him staring at the produce, key in hand, and I actually heard myself say, “Asher do NOT crank the bell pepper.”  The things you never expect to say in a day …

Which brings me to my question:  Asher has reached the age where he loves silliness and incongruence.  He loves to sing “Old McDonald had a …. octopus!” and then crack up.  I would love to do some games/ rhymes with him that really played up this aspect of toddler humor, but I can’t think of any.  Any suggestions?

We are working on a transportation theme this month, mostly because transportation is the big thing in our house right now.  Trains, racecars, and dump trucks – that’s all Asher cares about.  Even little Silas, who is not quite fifteen months old, likes to push cars and trucks around and say “beep beep.”   So I knew cars would be a big hit.

I’ve been researching transportation crafts this evening, and unfortunately we’ve already used many of their ideas in the past.  Please, send your transportation ideas my way.

I also think we’re going to make a trip out to my brother-in-law’s family trucking business sometime this month.  They are closed on Sundays, and he has offered to let Asher poke around one Sunday afternoon.  I cannot imagine a more exciting afternoon for Asher and Silas than one full of eighteen wheelers.

the truth?

A friend emailed me today and asked, “Have you given up on your activities blog?”

Here’s the thing: I am self-conscious about talking about things I am doing with my kids all the time, because it feels like a half-truth.  Yes, we paint and cook and explore together.  But I also deal with temper tantrums.  And turn on the television more than I would care to admit.  And get distracted in mid-sentence, so that my children are left meandering about, looking for what they may devour, while I’m trying to remember what else I needed for the diaper bag.  I’m a regular mom, just like everybody else, and it feels as though I’m painting a picture of soothing tones and happy faces all the time.  I wish that were true, but it’s not.

Even so, almost every single good and useful thing I’ve learned about parenting has come from another parent.  Also?  I studied child development, and care more than the average bear about the way children grow, learn, and think.  So I do think a blog that bounces around ideas would be genuinely useful.  Except that every time I start to write here, I get bashful about it.

So we’re going to start fresh.  I’ll tell what we’re doing, and I’ll assume you understand that for every good hour – when my children are engaged and nobody is crashing into their brother with toy airplanes – there has also been a moment at some point that day when I’ve had to take a deep breath and choose to step over a screaming toddler.

Agreed?  Good.  Because it’s time to get caught up on this month’s theme.

more on families

This week we painted a tree for our family tree (a family tree for a two year old is really just a tree with pictures of family members taped to it).  But we also had a good conversation about generations, and how our extended family is related to one another (by asking, “Who is Daddy’s brother?”  “Who is Mom’s mom?”  etc.).  The family theme has kept both of our interest for several weeks (which is key!), and seems to be going well.

We also checked out and are reading “What did Mommy do before you?” by Abby Levine.  As we are reading it, though, I have filled in some of their story with more of my own (such as, Mom got a degree and had a career.  I didn’t go straight from high school to marriage to babies, like the book says).  Even so, it is a great starting point for learning more about families and how they are created.

There are two other cute ideas for a family-themed month.  I hope to get to post them (along with the link with their original source) soon.

“my family” book

Asher and I made a My Family book today as our first activity for our Family month.  I asked him what he enjoyed doing the most with different members of his family.  Then I wrote the answers down on construction paper, and he decorated them.  He really enjoyed talking about all of his favorite memories with his family, and it will be a fun little book to have as he gets older.  The My Family book was definitely a hit.

mi familia

Well, I’m going to try it.  I’m going to attempt to have a theme every month as a focus of our books, outings, and activities.

My family has a skeleton to our day that never changes.  Breakfast, morning activity, lunch, nap, afternoon play, dinner prep, dinner, bath, stories, bed.  All of our families have a somewhat similar flow, I’m sure, because of the needs of small children.  And I have learned that I do not enjoy overplanning my day.  For example, I don’t know what I’ll be doing at 8:00 on Friday morning, and if I did, it would bother me.  But I do NEED a structure for our week – I need to know our time is punctuated by certain predictable activities.  It helps me make the most of my time, and to enjoy the down time we have, knowing when specific needs (for social interaction and maintaining our home) will be met.

So my idea is to have our theme of the month, and to talk about it throughout the month.  I may also plan one or two bigger events around our theme.  But I hope to have several activities related to our theme already prepared, so that when the mood strikes – i.e., when it’s raining outside, or the baby needs a longer nap, or whatever – we are all prepared with ways to interact with one another that are not media dependent.

Because my children will have a new cousin any day now, we have been talking more about families recently.  So our theme for August will be Families.  I’m collecting ideas for activities now, and I’ll post them here soon.  Again, my reason for posting any of this is to share what has worked for us and what hasn’t, as well as to hear things that have worked in your home.  So please, share!  Do you have any book recommendations on books about families?  Any ideas spring to mind as you’re thinking about family themes?  Anything you’ve done in the past that your children really enjoyed?  Anything I should avoid that hasn’t gone well for your family?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Okay, so I think this blog would be a great idea, if only I had any activities to offer.  The problem is, I got NOTHING.  I’ve done all of my fun stuff for the past several years with my early intervention kids, and now I’m out of anything novel or new to do.

But I did have an idea for this next school year.  What preschools do is choose a theme (some for the week, some for the month, depending on the school), and then teach within that theme.  I’m thinking about choosing a theme for each month, and then find activities that focus on that theme.  It would give me some direction and some new blood pumping into my used-up plans.  What do you think?

Now the real test will be a. can I follow through all month long? and b. can I follow through all year long?  We’ll see.

Any suggestions on themes?  I’ll let you know what I come up with, and I’ll definitely post any activities or links that I find here to share with you all as well.  What do you think?  Is this a really bad idea to try to do at home?

outdoor freedom

Most of the time, when I’m thinking of activities to do with my children, I’m thinking of art or academic activities. I was reminded yesterday that art/academics are really unimportant at my children’s current ages (2 1/2 and 13 months). Really, the only reason we do them at all is that Asher took an interest in them naturally, and I followed his lead into the world of foam letters and finger paints. But if he had shown no interest, it would not have been an indicator of his cognition or social development. In fact, letters aren’t even mentioned on developmental tests for children under three, and writing is only a small fraction of measuring fine motor abilities. At their ages, engagement and the freedom to explore safely are the most important “activities” any of us can do with our children. Encouraging curiosity and conversation creates lifelong learners, and teaching the value of experience over performance is the antidote to our achievement-driven educational system.

Having said that, I am the worst at thinking in terms of goals and accomplishments in my daily life.  I am focusing on being more mindful of valuing the experience above performance. Last week we went “exploring” along a local walking path to find some much-needed physical activity and freedom from the rules of being inside. Loud voices were permitted, jumping in mud puddles was applauded, and touching everything at eye level was preferred. After an hour and a half, my children were calmer, cognitively satiated, and TIRED. My sons loved the freedom, and I loved the chance to just enjoy their company without the demands of keeping them out of the china cabinet.

painting with bubbles

I read a great idea this morning on another blog and wanted to share the link with you. Click here to learn how to paint with bubbles. What a fun idea! It could also be easily transferred to a group activity (with poster board instead of card stock). We will definitely have to try this soon.

Anyone have any other ideas for activities with bubbles?

making puzzles

On a whim (really, just trying to figure out how to do something new with our old materials) Asher and I made puzzles last week. It just kind of developed as we went, but he really enjoyed it, so I thought I’d pass it on.

Asher likes to use scissors (“safety scissors,” he calls them), but so far just snips around the edges. Cutting in a line, moving scissors along paper, is a harder skill. Making puzzles is a good place to practice.

Asher picked out a few pictures from a coloring book. Then I cut the general outline out. When I was finished, I held the paper still while he cut lines across the picture in several places. When he was finished, he had four or five big pieces in front of him (a puzzle of his own making). He pieced them together, then glued them onto construction paper (we actually used the backs of previously used paper – I told you we were trying to make the most of what we had =), then painted his puzzle when it was dry.

It would also be fun to glue the picture onto cardboard (you could even use part of an empty cereal box, so that it wouldn’t be too thick for young children to cut), paint it, and then cut the pieces of your puzzle.  Older toddlers/ preschoolers might enjoy this a little more, so that they could play with their puzzle when it was complete.

Anyone else ever made puzzles? How did you do it?

ideas for baking cookies

Last week I baked cookies with three toddlers and a baby, and it went much better than I could have expected. A few quick (and completely lucky) decisions seem to keep the whole thing together, so I wanted to mention them and hear your ideas, too, on the best way to make cookies (or other treats) with young children.

1. I talked through it first.

I told the children in the very beginning that we were going to cook first, eat later. They would each have a turn working with me, and when their turn was over they would have to climb down from the stool. Once the cookies were in the oven we would all have a (non-cookie) snack together, and once snack was over we would get ready to decorate.

I know that sounds like I’m explaining to you that two plus two equals four, but so many times I forget to tell my child (or whatever child I’m teaching) what’s going to happen, and then I get frustrated because they are not cooperating with my plan. Did I think they were going to divine what I was expecting from them? Explaining ahead of time gives everyone equal footing, and makes enforcing rules later a matter of reminding, rather than continually re-teaching them.

Both my child and my neighbor’s children did exceptionally well with our plan. They never tried to eat the dough (I was shocked) or complained when their turn was over. Explaining to them ahead of time really helped.

2. I made the most of what I had.

We made beach-themed cookies out of Play-Doh shapes. I ran the set through the dishwasher the night before, and had shark, lobster, starfish, and sea horse cookie molds without having to buy or do anything out of the ordinary.

3. I gave them a little freedom.

This is so hard for me to do! I don’t want to waste dough or end up with creepy-looking cookies, but what’s the point of activities for children if I end up doing it in order to make sure it’s done “right”? Also, what am I communicating to my child if I’m constantly going behind him and “fixing” his work? Nothing good, I’m sure. So I had to let the cookies be a little crumbly and a little off-centered. The perfectionist in me groaned but the children had a lot more fun with me giving them a little freedom.

It’s your turn. What have you tried baking with your child? What has worked? What hasn’t?